(Image description: purple, pink, and yellow text on a white background that says “Queerness is where our hope lies.” Smaller purple text below attributes the quote to bell hooks. End image description.)
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Story of my life people. You know what’s real ? The struggle.
Happy Pride Month ♥
this right here is why ‘queer’ is an identity, not a slur
quick queer rant
im really tired of people within the LGBTQ+ community pointing fingers at each other and saying “you don’t really belong because you benefit from [insert type of privilege here]”
a cishet asexual still suffers from marginalization. their sexuality has been pathologized as a mental illness right along with gayness and transness. in a hypersexual heternormative culture where we’re told we must enjoy sex and we must be in relationships, an asexual person is made to feel as if they’re broken, as if they don’t exist, as if forcing sex and intimacy on them is a corrective measure to “fix them”
a straight trans woman still suffers from marginalization. being able to “pass” as a woman while also being in a relationship with a man does not negate the fact that trans people face the most violence out of anyone in the queer community, must face a society that enforces a standard of womanhood that may not necessarily apply to them, and must navigate a political climate that seeks to banish them from public spaces and paint them as criminals
a bisexual man in a relationships with a woman still suffers from marginalization. compulsory heterosexuality not only erases this identity but enforces this idea that bisexuality is a phase or a kink that can soon be grown out of. bisexuality is the largest subset of the LGBTQ+ community yet has the least amount of representation and leaves bi people more likely to have mental illnesses. being constantly recloseted when you date different genders has psychological and emotional consequences
individuals in a polyamorous relationship still suffer from marginalization. they exist in a society that hails monogamy as the only acceptable relationship model and attempts to make polyamorous individuals feel as if their relationships are abnormal, deviant, and inappropriate for children. they are treated as the example of what not to do, seeing as how society fails to acknowledge the breadth of relationship models that don’t necessarily have to include just two people.
examples like these can go on and on and on and on
these critiques also exist without the context of race, ethnicity, immigration status, ability, and/or religion. we’re so focused on worrying about whether certain queer identities even belong in the LGBTQ+ umbrella yet fail to see how whiteness, Christianity, citizenship laws, access to disability services, etc. further compound on the experiences of those who are told by a cishet world that we are abnormal.
and that’s what it comes down to: there is a formula for privilege in our society, and part of that formula involves being straight, being cis, wanting to marry, desiring sex, and believing in only two genders. queerness was always meant to represent those who live in opposition of those formulas, in opposition of systems that enforce and perpetuate those formulas.
our job is not to gatekeep our community because that is childish and unproductive. our job is to understand the systems that oppress us, figure out how to navigate/change these systems, and advocate for all people who fall victim to the violence and oppression that these systems were created to enforce.
we don’t do that by telling people that they don’t belong in our communities bc “they’re not as oppressed as we are.” this isn’t the oppression olympics. this is a time to fight, to love, and to advocate.
fucking preach, thank you
TBH the more I think about what queerness is and how people experience it in such a wide variety of ways, the more certain that I am that polyamory is a form of queerness too.
Because at the end of the day, the best definition of queer than I have is: identities and relationship models that threaten peri/cis/heteronormative social structures by existing in defiance of them.
And polyamory is definitely one of those. So is asexuality and aromanticism. So is bisexuality, so is lesbianism and gayness, and transness, and intersexuality too.
That’s what binds these groups together. Existing outside acceptable social structures based on gender and sexuality.
But, IDK, I guess that’s an outdated definition too, considering the recent “only trans and SGA” bullshit.
Whatever, it’s the definition I will continue to use, so fuck that.
I’m on the fence with the whole poly being queer idea but I agree with the rest of the post
Yeah, no, that’s fair. It’s an opinion that hasn’t been part of mainstream queer anything in literally decades, and there is probably a reason it shifted out? I’m not sure what that reason is. Some people say it’s a respectability politics thing but I have nothing other than minor anecdotal evidence from a few of my elders (3 lesbian separatists in the over 55 age group) to back that up.
Given that the only definition that has ever particularly managed to encapsulate queerness for me is “an identity that suffers under peri/cis/hereteronormativity” and that my polyamory absolutely does in ways I can easily correlate to other oppressions based on romantic and sexual behaviours, including both how the aggression manifests and its root source, it makes sense to me to include polyam people under the queer umbrella.
But I’m not at all going to start enforcing that in the same way I will aggressively enforce the inclusion of aro/ace-spec people. I am well aware that it’s a very fringe idea.
"im not homophobic it’s a children’s series" translated is:
"im not homophobic i just think children, including queer ones themselves, should not be exposed to queer characters bc of those characters queerness, which implies i think there’s something wrong/bad about being queer”
im sorry what about that isnt homophobic/queerphobic as fuck???
THIS IS THE THING
When folks say “Protect Lil Nas X” I want you to understand that this is coming from a deep place in queer culture. One of the prime directives of the queer community is to protect young and recently out queer folks. It comes from a place of understanding that coming out is inherently a traumatic process. Being young and queer in a community where queerness is not accepted is inherently traumatic.
It does not matter if the young queer person is annoying or cringe or wearing rainbows from head to toe and transforming themselves into a walking stereotype. That’s part of the process of reclaiming identity for a LOT of people. Sometimes shoving it in people’s faces is the only way you can get over the instinct to cower and conform. It doesn’t matter if they made some off-color jokes while they work through internalized queerphobia. It doesn’t even matter if you like the young queer person much as a person.
You protect them. Because someone protected you. Or because no one was around to protect you, and you know how much that sucked. You see a young person in a gay bar that looks a little lost or nervous, guess what? That’s your child now. Go help them fix their lip gloss and tell them their body glitter is cute and teach them how to tell if someone is giving them the eye from across the room. You see them getting hassled? Take out those earrings, you’re giving someone a smackdown tonight.
The queer community has been so turned against itself in recent years, we’re forgetting our fucking roots. We’re not here to bitch out queer kids for making mistakes while they figure out who the fuck they are. We’re here to throw bricks at cops.
(Image description: the genderqueer, queer, queer triangle, and queer chevron pride flags with the words “the queer family has no borders” centered in white text.)
If you see a post about racism
and your immediate response is
"OMFG THAT’S JUST LIKE WHAT I EXPERIENCE WITH MY QUEERNESS"
You are actually basically actively perpetuating imperialistic ideologies.
Essentially, you are telling a...
I’m just done with ~implied~ queerness, with ‘nods’ to queer fans, with speculation and almosts and queerbaiting in all its forms
I am done with subpar representation and breadcrumbs
I want canon queer characters and I want them now
Create them. Put them into the world yourself, if you really care about it.
like do these people think i control the mass media or something
We need a digital archive of LGBTQ+ works of art, science, and every other conceivable work we can share between each other because we are beyond the genocide warning level in most countries in the west and they're already trying to purge us from libraries.
If other people are interested I'll make this a priority
Speaking as someone with a background in archives, stuff like this does already exist. No need to reinvent the wheel. Creating an archive and making sure it's accessible and searchable and actually preserves things for the long time (especially digital things) is actually a huge undertaking. Show some love to these already existing collections and maybe even consider contributing. There's the Digital Transgender Archive off the top of my head. I know more I just have to think.
The History Project, based in Boston, is an LGBTQ+ community archive that's existed for decades. Many of their collections are digitized.
The Lesbian Herstory Archives, based in Brooklyn, is similar.
The Digital Public Library of America covers a great many topics, but they also have LGBTQ+ stuff.
I'd also recommend searching "lgbtq+" and "libguide" in your preferred search engine. Many universities list helpful resources and databases, some of which are freely accessible.
Many public and academic libraries in the US and Canada (not sure where you're writing from) subscribe to the Gale Archives of Sexuality and Gender. If you have a library card or are a student at a given library, you can access it for free.
In general, I'd really recommend searching around to see how you can support existing museums, community archives, college and university archives, etc that specialize in LGBTQ+ history and media local to you, whether that's in your same town or regionally.
Adding--
The Queer Newark Oral History Project (QNOHP) records interviews with LGBTQ Newarkers about their lives, makes their stories accessible to academic and community-based researchers, students, and artists; sponsors innovative programming that bridges the community and campus, spreads awareness of oral history methods, and commemorates the community's elders.